as I am lost.

What you can't seem to remember,

is that I

remember

everything,

I cling to every barren string of hope

and ask with wide-eyed

innocence

if you hate me

I disect each word

written, spoken, hidden,

I walk between the lines

collecting the crumbs left behind

piecing together the puzzles I make with my own mind

but they're not as pretty as the words you speak,

the pictures rip me to shreds

as I'm forgotten, hour after hour

left unmentioned

and only in convience am I beckoned.

I dislike this one, but here you go,

The gift of your voice

rolls off your tongue,

with each bitter syllable biting,

chewing,

and spitting out

unfathomable insults

laced in pretty little boxes

coaxing me through sand paper wrapping

closer,

unsteady feet fumbling towards the edge

Jump your insults persist

Jump, and it all will be over

no longer spend your days

wasted on hopless prayers

fruitless wishes,

jump and the bitter pill of solitude

no longer has to be swallowed

jump and no longer bear the burden of broken wings

jump because everyone loves a dead girl,

each word and explosion of peace,

poking exactly where I needed it

I inched closer,

the rush of winds mixed with the roaring waters,

If I jump,

when I jump,

the roars respond tickiling me

all my senses alive with the whisper

jump

I fall only to be caught in midair,

it must have been a sight

to just see the body dangling there

pulled back to ground by ungrateful hands

but even they whisper

you should have jumped

thinning smoke (is probably really cliche)

       We stood there,

as I watched your smoke drift into thin air

beneath glowing light,
                  reminisant to the night

as your venom poured sweetly,
                   biting the words you spoke

you hid abondoned mines,
                unexplored crevises of your mind

but I poked and pried,

ingored the danger signs

I infected you

invading your every move

I protected you, when the skeletons piled high,

                I buried them in my chest

locking them away in places you'll never see

I let you put your misery
                in me

I hoped the happiness would fill the barren space,

yet all that seemed to fill was waste,

more to hide in my own shafts

as your conciense hobbled down narrow paths,

I pulled at your blinders

set free your reigns,

and expected once your free you would return to me again

and even through the nights, when my own flame was fickle

I kept you, as you forgot me I never left you

your abandoned cries echo through ears,

but what I regret is, I'm always here.

Choked

She whispers I love you,

        as if the vehement declaration

would burn her tongue

        so,

she lets the mumble

               trickle

through her vocal chords,

As her mind cries out that

she is not RELUCTANT,

she believes,

 the things she leaves constricted

             inside,

the ardor she dosen't want to hide.

        but her verve is choked,

restricted to mildly flicker in her eyes,